Sinking ships!

Well I feel this picture represents my month well!Things started off ok on my journey but when the variance kicked in it kind of sent me on a different journey.The TILT journey.

As a player I'm pretty disgusted right now with:
A:How I'm playing
B:How I'm dealing with the mental stresses of the game
C:Just how bad I have ran for the last few months

I really can't seem to rise above running bad and I'm the most tilted I have ever been.I really hate feeling like this and the times I have felt like this before I have wanted to quit.It's a bit different when you have played for a few years and have some extra bankroll cash lying around but I still feel really unmotivated by how bad I seem to be running/playing.I'm just going to stop after today's session.AKsvAQs lost aipf and AA v 99 lost aipf.I actually had 8s hold aipf 100bb deep against AK the same session before these two hands so I thought things were normal again.I feel so weak I really can't take it and I have hardly put hands in this month.I don't know how all the big grinders do it.Sends me mental bleh!



I'm due around $650ish in rakeback so this will take a little out of the sting but it's still a RED month :(

I really need to take a holiday somewhere so that's going to be my target next month.Lior sorry I couldn't take the opening in LV I just don't think it's right for me at this moment in time.I'm really off-it like never before :(

I'll make another blog again when I start back up playing,hopefully with some solid GREEN results.

gg

PartyScout

$5k Downswings,life tilt kicks in!!!

Well things are pretty bad with poker at the moment. I always play poorly when I run bad as I seem to not be able to deal with the variance as well as others.
Yesterday I carried on and ended the day -$2200 stuck. I really played terrible and most of the loses where my own fault just getting it in bad.

Today has sucked as well basically getting it all-in on 2 pots with cooler type hands that play their self’s. One was 50% and other was 39% to win. Both pretty bad spots basically flipping for money. Might as well play roulette it seems at the moment as I’m playing horribly and running just as bad which makes me play this bad

I think I need to take a break from poker again for a while. Don’t know if I need days or a week? I will know when I’m ready to return. At the moment in cash games I’m -$1600 stuck and up $200 at donkaments and probably have $500ish in rake back so that leaves me around -$900 stuck for the month for 11.5k hands. Fun times! My confidence has taken a real beating as well as my Full Tilt Bank Roll!!!

Over next few days I'm planning not even turning the computer on I’m that fed up. I wan’t to take a break,then when I’m ready to return probably do some positive thinking and look at months where I’m 4k stuck with 2 weeks left then finishing a few Ks up. This might get me motivated and In a more positive mood.



$5k Downswings,fun times!This graph looks like I have been playing with my eyes closed, I assure you they were open, If they were closed I might have done better lol.

Hands
~ Played11,525
~ Needed:11,610
~ Required:8,475

Running bad continues,frustration creeping in?

So I just fire up 6 tables and bang in today's hands in no time.Thing is I just dropped 3+ stacks:(

Session Hands

Bit of history with player(prob why I shove)of course everyone can hit 2 and 3/4 outtas on me all in and I can miss 8outs all day and shove when I have no FE meh!

LAWL!Really T-6o utg vnp.Obv he knows he flop monster draw and it will be good ldo

These aces suck at times.Another 2outta,obv this donk donks my coin off to some other player after then leaves,meh!

After He said he had Qs,I just gave up after flop thinking with how I'm running he will show me JJ/AK..my first thoughts was if I push wtf are they going to call with.Anyway after turn hits I'm not putting no more in.Happy with my decision(even though on flop I was good)saved me a stack in the end!

This hand is pretty bad,after blind calls and sees turn I dont have him on set as they raise that on the flop mostly 3 way and I decide that he has a draw so bet weakish into turn hoping to induce a draw to shove.I was thinking to check turn and c/c most rivers.How I played this hand is pretty horrible,I think I chose the line given as I was kinda tilted.Oh well.Quited straight after knowing this was a pretty bad mistake.


Some big hands I won also but I don't feel like posting them.Run bad,play bad,look bad mood I think :(

I think I will chill watch a film then play later if I feel up to it.I really want to pound it this weekend and drop some hands in but I will have to give it a miss if I don't feel like it after this session and yesterdays session ended only up $270 for 900 hands after getting 2 outta'd in a two huge pots.Meh.This really feels like worst I have run for a long while.On a positive note at least my rakeback this month will cover 2-3 stacks :)

Hands
~ Played11,089
~ Needed:10,965
~ Required:8,911

Love to hate this game

Super swingy day for me yesterday,but I'm very happy to only end up $275 stuck with all the bad luck I got handed out.

Session Hands

Losers
This really does suck,meh!

Don't think this player read Theory Of Poker lol

I really did laugh when I saw this one(maybe bet turn meh?)

Whatever!

So I expert drop stack in to make it look bluff so less would call

Winners
Would have been funny if this didn't catch up,must admit

lol,only way I can stack off is when they deal out coolers,surprised he didn't hit the 4outta after being 3 and 2 outta'd all day :(

Another bold move,how do I get away with this running as good as I did yesterday?







Yesterday I hooked up with an old friend and was discussing general things in life whilst supping Stella in a beer garden and he made me think I don't have much of a life.I agree.I hardly play half as much as some other Internet Pros but I do miss the other things in life like having regular drinking missions with buddies,having a steady girlfriend and just doing normal things that a big percentage of us don't do.I'm toying around with the idea of having one month targets then if I do good just take the next month off(not all of it ldo)but just try to do lots of normal things and only play when you want.I definitely think it's a good idea to start rewarding myself with normal stuff or I'm going to go nuts

This weekend I'm planning on playing a ton and not seeing daylight as I want to have hit my hand target before end of month so I can go out and be normal drinking with buddies at the end of the month :)

Hands
~ Played:8,748
~ Needed:9,030
~ Required:11,252

Mid month update

Thought I should make an effort and make this mid-month update as I found some motivation.

Man United 2 -0 Wigan
Yes I am red and proud and we lift the cup again.Holla


Things have not really been going my way so far this month, but I seem to be over the worst of it and must be due a good upswing anytime soon with how last month ended and this month started!


Yesterday was pretty fun I banged in a few hands as I was getting far behind on my hand target and I’m only 272hands off target now so that was good at least!

One thing that I continually find funny and when I think about it it still makes me laugh inside, is when poker players have bad days and break even or make $400-$1000 or whatever becase they lost a few pots to the variance of the game, we don’t "think man I just won more in a day than normal people make all week" we always think about how good the day could have been. Haha so funny that we really are never greatful but I suppose that’s what drives good players to become better and rise through the games!

I got unlucky a few times as well although the hands are standard it still sucks as I could have had an extra $1600 added onto my day

Session Hands
This hurt a bit but I certainly don't want him to fold the turn but sklansky bucks are not as good as real bucks,or are they?

This one stung as it was not long after the above hand on a diffrent table, sucks to lose being so huge % on the flop

Quit not long after this as the table donk got busted and this guy moved on,poker is not much fun playing good players and no easy marks. This hand just proves that there's alot of dead money ar FT MSNL. If I played this hand I would quit after getting $550 in dead on the turn,man that would tilt the shit outta me!

Ironman $20k Gold Freeroll
I also played in the Ironman Gold $20k freeroll on Full Tilt whilst 5 table 2/4(yes me 6 tabling lol wtf)
Did ok I nearly Final Table’d it . 447 runners I finish unlucky 13!Ship that $200,LOLDONKAMENTS!

I want to include a link to a post that I read today, it’s very long but I feel it’s a good story to read for anyone that knows about poker or just doesn’t understand the choices poker players make in life. This is one of the best posts that I read on twoplustwo recently.

Hands

~ Played: 6,178

~ Needed:6,450

~ Required:13,550

Few hands from a flat session

Things went pretty bad yesterday, I decided to just quit after 354hands as things were not going my way and I felt very overtired.I went about $1k stuck then ended $50up so pretty much break even day.

Session Hands

Best thing about this hand was the players stack

Run bad with AA on FT.Every time money goes in I lose for stacks :( 82.4% meh!

This was a nice play,this player was getting so lucky it felt nice :)Really bad for him to be calling 4bet OOP

Same player,yeah I finish him off(Line defiantly not standard,I had him on some kind of pair as he just smooth calls his draw hands)


Apart from a dodgy 3bet and horrible cont hand OOP I feel I was playing well and would have continued if I had not felt so tired.


Hands
~ Played: 354
~ Needed:645
~ Required:19,646